It seems I have another blog post in me for today. In the wake of the horrible events in Manchester, I have read many articles. One that I read talked about the deliberate targeting of women at the concert, of young women celebrating female empowerment. Targeted due to the misogyny at the heart of the attackers’ beliefs.
It made me so mad. So very mad. How dare they! And it made me quite sure that this would not cause me to stand down. If you don’t know how firmly I believe in female empowerment, then you clearly haven’t been reading my books or my stories.
And, as a writer, I have specific ways of fighting back against hate and acts of destruction. And that is the creation of words. So here, have a poem I feel strongly about. Because believe me, I will continue to stand up for what I believe in and who I am. And I will stand up for every single young woman out there who is today afraid because of this act of violence. You are strong. You are Wonderful. You are loved. We are with you. We stand with you. We will Endure. We choose love.
I was absolutely lucky to be there as Two Lippy Ladies (a shop full of divine gorgeousness that I require) had a little contest and guess who won two tickets and a signed copy of Lisa’s book. This gal.
Now, honestly I didn’t know what to expect but I thought it would be fun and I should get something out of it. But let me tell you after I got out, it felt like it had been one of those fates in motion moments and I was meant to be there. It was so much what I needed to hear. Most of you will know that things haven’t been the best lately. PCOS can be a real moo-cow, sleep deprivation does not do nice things to the mind or the soul. I have had some moments of total lowness. I have been climbing back out of it, refocusing myself and starting to achieve things again. I knew I still had a long way to go. I just haven’t really known how to get there.
Lisa helped. Oh, how she helped. Her talk was hilarious. Absolutely laugh out loud funny and damn, if a good laugh isn’t sometimes exactly what you need. She was also completely insightful on many aspects of life. From making yourself a priority, to the people in your life who contribute vs contaminate.
It is important that you work out who is contaminating your life and who is contributing to it. People who are contributing will add value: they will improve your life, lift your energy and make you feel better.
She spoke about all the balls we are constantly trying to juggle. I have a lot of balls I am juggling. Though, in Princess Bard fashion it seems less fitting to call them balls. I’m working on what they are instead. Maybe magical glowing orbs? Jaidee likes that. Briar thinks they should be jewel-encrusted daggers that are on fire, honestly, some days it does feel like that is an accurate description.
Lisa talked about so much that I needed to hear, some things I didn’t necessarily want to hear either. So today I am starting reading the book, well, technically I started on the book at 6:27 this morning. (Was it the full moon last night because sleep and me were not friends, I felt like the energizer after 42 cups of coffee – I could see through space and time and find all the answers to life, the universe, and everything. Yet I woke up full of get up and go rather than in Zombie Princess mode like normal.) So, yes, book today and more looking at my life. And I am seriously thinking about taking her Big Love 6-week online course. Just need to wrangle up the funds (So if you could head over and buy a book on Amazon to help me, I would love you so much.) It is something I’m working on, finding Big Love for myself. Or, in my world, becoming Wiccad Within. I can help people until the cows come home to find that light inside themselves but I admit to not being so great at it myself.
And I am so done with that.
I am done with letting the world dictate how bright I burn, I am going to shine so brightly that I light up my kingdom. And I know that is something that only I can achieve.
So here is to the Fates, Two Lippy Ladies and Lisa O’Neill for bringing me just what I needed. And here is to the happiness that is coming, the success, and a bright shining Princess Bard with her magical glowing orbs all being juggled while wearing her crown.
A poem for a girl who lost her beloved brother. The last of her family. A poem for Catherine. The sweet girl has never had it easy, and even the loss of her brother was not the final hardship of her life.
So, having seen Beauty and the Beast yesterday I am all about that soundtrack, and sweet Faerierebel gave me this prompt because she was first onboard this new obsession. So here we have something little, something part prose, part poem, all heartache. Enjoy…
Life could be so cruel, life could be so tragic. And yet the heart keeps hoping. The heart keeps wanting.
And I let you into my melancholy heart.
You’re there in every moment, thoughts plague me. I can’t shake you and you are not mine to keep.
The first moment I saw you, I felt the connection. You walked into my heart like you walked through the open door. Call it clichéd if you want but I know my instincts are always right. The moment you walked into my life I knew what we could be to each other, the passion, the pleasure, the happiness. And I yearn for happiness. My life has not had much of it lately. The sadness held me so tight it almost took my life.
And then you walked into my melancholy heart, one smile and you inscribed your name deep on my soul.
Yet the melancholy remains, no happiness to be had. You are not mine. You’re hers instead.
And I can do nothing but watch and pretend that I can bear to watch you make her smile. Pretend that I am happy for you are her happiness, her contentment. I fix a smile in place and try to fake it until I make it to being happy for you both and not seething green inside with envy.
Why did you walk into my heart if you never planned to let me into yours? You smiled at me like you knew it too and then the moment was gone as she flew into your arms.
But I can’t let this break me. I can’t fall to the darkness where I was before. You’re so far beyond my reach though you’re always within my grasp. So close and yet so far, and I must not let it destroy me. The heart keeps hoping, the heart keeps wanting.
The nights are long and full of aching and I know I cannot keep waiting for something that will not happen. You are hers. You are her happiness.
But when you glanced this way, I thought I saw… No one has ever looked at me that way before.
And so, my heart keeps hoping, my heart keeps wanting.
And my melancholy heart will be yours for evermore.
I just finished the final edit on My Fair Catherine. Editing is hard. There is so much editing. I use the word ‘that’ too much… But I am so proud of what this book has transformed into. It’s so good. And I’m not the only one who thinks so…
So with just a few days to go, I thought you might want to know what to look for when you go looking for My Fair Catherine – City of the Wiccad: Episode 2.
We went through a lot more different concepts for this book cover and there wasn’t often agreement until we came up with the idea below. I am excited and I do love this look, it’s perfect for a Victorian Supernatural tale with love, drama, vampires, strong women, intrigue and revelations.